Monday, October 10, 2016

Chicago 26.2: A Recap of #11

I did it!!!! Yesterday I completed my ELEVENTH marathon and I crossed that finish line with huge smile on my face and then completely broke down in tears. Big, happy, hard-earned, sobbing tears. After everything that has happened with my injury over the last six months, I couldn't believe that I actually did this. Sure, I've run a marathon before (which doesn't make it any easier), but this was one that I wasn't totally sure would happen, even down to the last day. But now I sit here sore, accomplished, proud, and happy. And still can't believe I did it.

If you haven't been keeping up with what's been going on, I partially tore my hamstring in the Brooklyn Half Marathon in May. It was really my first major running injury and was not only painful physically, but it hurt me mentally because hated not being able to run just for fun, because it truly is something I love to do.  I rested it for a couple of weeks (admittedly not as much as I should have), did some PT, and it improved a bit, but not nearly as fast as I would have liked. With the approval of my physical therapist, I very slowly and cautiously started coming back to running in late June, but the pain was still present. I probably came back too quickly, but not running was hurting me so much mentally. I just wasn't feeling myself and it sucked.

In my "comeback," I really took my time building up mileage and would stop any time I felt my hamstring moved past the stage of discomfort and became actual pain, but I tried not even to get to that point. As the start of marathon training came and went, I still wasn't ready to begin. Eight weeks later, after adjusting my training schedule, I was ready to tackle this. I had ten weeks (versus the regular 18) to build up my mileage on a body that still wasn't at 100%. I was running about 2-3 times a week and spinning once a week, making sure not to overdo it at all, but doing way less training than in the past. The day before the deferment deadline I did my 18 mile run with little issues so I figured I'd be good to go come race day.  I still suffered from some pain and discomfort each time I ran, but was getting use to it. Two weeks later when it was time for my one and only 20-miler of this new training cycle, I started feeling pain at mile 15. The kind of pain where I felt if I kept going, I would hear that little pop in my hamstring again. I kept running a bit and then decided to call it quits at mile 16, very discouraged and very uncomfortable. It wasn't worth pushing for another four miles on this training run and risk totally re-injuring myself. It wasn't worth it. I'd have to go into this race without a 20 under my belt.

I could deal with a little re-aggravation, but this put some doubt in my mind about the big day so I became a little more pro-active. After hearing many people rave about acupuncture, I caved and made an appointment. I had three weeks until the big day and even if this had a placebo affect, I would take it. After the first appointment, I felt a little relief and thought I was ready for my half marathon that upcoming weekend. I figured if the pain was bad like the previous week, I'd walk off the course and go home. Well, the race went poorly, but it wasn't even really because of my hamstring. Sure it hurt a bit, but my entire body felt lethargic and my head was just never really in it. Once I crossed that finish line I was relieved, but not even tired. That's how I knew it was mostly in my head, so I had to get that in check. And STAT. I had heard of this book that was basically a sports psychology book for runners (How Bad Do You Want it?: Mastering the Psychology of Mind over Muscle by Matt Fitzgerald) so I immediately ordered it online to help get my head in the game. I also scheduled another acupuncture appointment for the following week and for the week before the marathon. My eight miler the Sunday before the race went great. There was a little pain in my hamstring but my legs felt amazing and I was running more focused. The week leading up to the marathon, I felt little pressure; probably the least crazy I have been in my tapering (minus the giving people sneezing and coughing dirty looks and obsessively taking my ginger pills). I had made peace with myself that if I had to walk off the marathon course, I would. I'd do my best, but I wasn't going to put my body at risk for potentially permanent damage in my hamstring. It just wasn't worth it. My goal was to just finish this race in one piece and happy.

The Friday before the race, I finished my book, which was a total game changer and gave me a completely new mindset that I was ready to put to the test, went and got my final acupuncture and also got my hamstring KT taped for extra support. Then it was off to the marathon expo; by myself for the first time ever which was a little strange. I barely teared up in the expo which was a step in the right direction. And when they didn't carry the gels I use, and I didn't even panic. Who was I? Running with such little expectations was mellowing me out. Who knew?

My Saturday morning shake-out run went perfectly and then my mom came to the city for a visit. We walked around for a bit and then it was time to relax, order my pre-race Lou Malnati's and prep for the big day. My friend's husband came into the city to stay over since he was running the next day too. This would be the first time I would be living in the city for this race and have an easy commute to the start line. I slept pretty awful the night before out of anxiousness but was still alert and ready when it was finally time to get up. We got to the start about an hour and half before our corrals closed, hit the bathroom twice and soon enough were ready to roll.

Once we crossed that start line, it was game time. My friend's husband is way faster than me so we lasted about two minutes together until he peeled off ahead of me (and went on to absolutely kill his marathon!) and waited to find my groove. About one mile in the race, I knew that I was going to do this. I just felt it. I was so focused and just so happy to be there. My head was in the game. I was excited to run this course and finally know where I'd be in the city. I would run my own race, take my time at the water stops, and just be grateful to be able to be out there running. I also knew I had my parents and some friends along the way so I had that to look forward to. I figured if I could make it to the halfway point with no pain, I would finish this race, even if it meant walking. My mom and dad would for sure be at mile 13, 22, and 26 and I couldn't wait to see them. I saw a good friend at mile 9 which was awesome, saw a friend from my Israel trip unexpectedly at mile 10, and even got water from the Depaul Men's basketball team. They were manning the water station around there and I welcomed the site of very hot (yet very young) basketball players. Swoon. Next up would be my parents and they were going to have pickle juice and some Tylenol and Aleve for me. I kept seeing articles on how pickle juice is amazing at squashing cramping and since cramping has been an issue for me at my last couple of marathons, I wanted to be ready to beat it this time around. When I hit mile 13, I felt a little twinge in my right calf which was far too early for this to start happening. Just like years past, cramping was never an issue on any training run, but kept raring its ugly head on race day and I didn't know why. When I saw my parents at 13, I took a big sip of the nasty-ass pickle juice and kept it moving. I grabbed extra Gatorade at the next aid station (and all the subsequent ones to get that extra sodium) to keep the cramps away. I had a friend waiting for me at mile 15 and after that, I wouldn't have anyone until my parents again around mile 22. I saw my friend at 15, got a huge high five from him and then I went into the zone. I was laser focused and just putting one foot in front of the other pushing on, pain free. It was an incredible feeling being in charge of my mind and my body and pressing on, believing I could do this.

Last year, my calves went into full cramp/spasm mode around mile 17 and never stopped. This time, I was still all good at that point. I felt strong. I felt capable. I was doing this. When I hit mile 18 and still felt good, I was a happy camper. I didn't run longer than this the whole 10-week training period so I knew that today really coming together. My hamstring pain was almost non-existent, I still hadn't cramped up, and I was just so full of positive self-talk and repeating mantras to myself that I was unstoppable. I really couldn't believe it. Mind over muscle. Although I wasn't going fast, I was going, and this was happening. I passed Mile 20 and then 21 and still was feeling happy and strong. I kept it going and was getting excited to see my parents again at Mile 22. When I saw them, I teared up (yes there is photographic evidence of this again, and its not pretty), told them "I got this." I drank more of the pickle juice and took the Tylenol and Aleve. My mom was prepared to hop in with me if I needed an extra push, but I felt so strong, I didn't need it. I'd see them again in four miles and knew I'd make it there. I don't know if I've ever been so focused in my life and it felt good to be in charge of that. The book had seriously changed my mental game and it was awesome. I kept pushing and at Mile 25 my right quad started to spasm a little but I pushed the pain to the back of my head and kept going. I wasn't going to walk it off. I had come this far and I was going to win this battle. I saw my parents at mile 26 and started tearing up again at seeing them, being so close to the end, and also from the pain from my spasming quad. If you know anything about the Chicago Marathon, its a pretty flat course except for the uphill at the final 200 meters. I told myself I would not walk up this hill. I had come this far without walking (minus some of the water stops) and I wasn't caving now. Once I got up the hill and turned the corner I knew I did it. I was ecstatic. This was a race I wasn't even sure I'd start, let alone finish, and I did it. As soon as I crossed the finish line, I broke down in tears. I pulled out my phone and called my parents hysterically crying, bursting with pride. A nice man put his arm around me and congratulated me while tears were running down my face. I really couldn't believe that I did this. And in a decent time. A time faster than others when I'd been healthy from the get go. I did it!

I credit the acupuncture and the book with getting me through this marathon. I believed in the process of both and they didn't fail me. Hamstring pain was almost non-existent during the race and I was the strongest mentally I think I've ever been in a race. I didn't put pressure on myself and really believed I could do it. This marathon was special to me, not only because it was my first Chicago Marathon as a Chicago resident, but more so because I overcame an injury that hurt me physically and mentally and put my body and mind to the test; however, I came back on top. It's such a great, indescribable feeling and I hope to carry this marathon high a few more days. I deserve it.

1 comment:

  1. You are amazing girl!!! Soak in it as long as possible <3 you deserve it! Congrats!!

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