Saturday, April 6, 2013

Nut. Milk.

Nut. Milk.
So for the last three days, I have had a liquid diet of juice. By choice. Yup, no chewing. (Not even gum.) Just juice. Cooler Cleanse fresh-pressed, raw, vegan juice. The night before I began the cleanse I didn't sleep well out of anxiety and fear for not eating real food for three days in a row. Although I received a lot of support from friends and family about this cleanse, it still didn't stop the anxiousness. Most people I told about the cleanse were really supportive and excited for me. I was very appreciative of that. People who hadn't done a cleanse before were kind of glad I was their guinea pig because some of them had toyed with the idea of doing one as well. And those that had done it before had nothing but positive things to say about it. This was reassuring and I was glad to have the support and curiosity. Many people also asked if I was going to blog about my Cooler Cleanse experience. My answer: "But of course!!" I love to over-share. And I'm pretty good at it.

I purposely did this cleanse during the work week to assure myself I would be kept busy during the cleanse and not just be laying around the apartment bored or doing longer workouts and running around doing errands on the weekends. Also the timing of it was just perfect which helped my reasoning about doing it (as explained in my post a few days ago.) I also knew that, regardless of the time, if I was spending $174 on juices, I wasn't spending money on anything else and I was going to do this thing just as it is recommended. So how did it go? Well, thanks for asking!! I am sure I will give you more detail than you ever wanted to hear. Additionally, this is probably the longest post I have written to date (although it's three days worth if information so be prepared), but you know what? This is my blog, so I'll do what I want.

Day 1: The first day wasn't as torturous as I imagined it would be which was a relief. I picked up my juices in the morning and lugged them home. Do you know how heavy 18 bottles of juice are for seven blocks and one avenue? Heavy. I put them all in my very empty fridge and took out my four to bring to work and headed off. Cooler Cleanse provided me with 2 cooler bags with ice packs in each one for easy transpo. I am lucky that I have a fridge in my class to keep my juices super cold throughout the day. There are six juices a day for this cleanse and it is recommended to drink one every two hours. That just won't work for me because I get up early and don't want to stop drinking at like 6:00 so I decided I was going to make a schedule for myself. The first juice that I drank at 8:30 was the Sweet Green Juice (Kale, spinach, parsley, and apple) and it was freaking delicious. I drank it slow and savored it. Yum. I didn't want it to end. Juice number two was after my third period class at 11:40 and was a Grapefruit Mint.  I was ready for it by then because I had now gone almost three hours with nothing else in my system besides water. I do not like grapefruit at all but had to suck it up. I drank the first half pretty quick to get it done, and then I added water to it to dilute it. Then I drank half of that and added more water. This juice took me like an hour to drink. I actually felt pretty good at this point in the day and was quite energized. Although my bladder was out. of. control. I was peeing even more than usual. I had two more classes to teach and had to drink my third in the middle of them (at like 2:00). Juice three was the Essential Green (cucumber, celery, dandelion greens, spinach, parsley, kale, pear, lemon, and ginger) and it kind of tasted a bit too veggie/grassy for me. I think I expected a sweeter juice because it had pear in it, but it wasn't all that bad, but I wouldn't necessarily describe it as good either. When I got halfway done, I also added more water to it to dilute it and make it last longer. I think this helped keep me full a bit longer. I started to get a little light headed by 3:30 but still pretty invigorated. It wasn't a dizzy-light headedness, but almost more of buzz. So not so bad.

I had juice number four, Spicy Lemonade (lemon, lime, cayenne pepper, raw agave, filtered water), at 4:00 when I got home from work. This is kind of a riff on the Master Cleanse drink made famous by Beyoncé, but since I am a giant wuss, this was super spicy to me. It made my lips burn and after every sip, I kept adding water to the bottle to dilute it down. (I secretly prayed it wouldn't burn as bad coming out as it did going in.) The actual lemonade taste of it was good, but the kick in it was a little too much for me. Once I added the water, it simmered down a bit. But then my stomach started to kick up a notch. If you know what I mean. Wink. Wink. Yup, I had to poop. (Of course, this wasn't going to be a poop-free post. C'mon now. You guys know me even though I haven't written about my bowels in a while.) My stomach didn't hurt or anything, but lets just say things weren't solid. Kinda like my current diet. Zing. This little situation made me grateful I didn't overdue it with my meals the day before the cleanse because things may have been a lot worse. I was fine after that little episode and went for a brisk 45 minute walk with a friend. I honestly didn't think when I started this cleanse that I would have the energy to do this but I was more than fine and it was quite refreshing. I brought my fifth juice with me along the way to drink and realized that I have been drinking these at a pretty good speed. Juice five was Essential Red (carrot, beet apple, and lemon) and I drank it at 6:00. When I started drinking it, I was already full but had to get it down because all juices need to be drank during the day, and in order. This one was pretty tasty and took me a long while to drink. Seriously, I couldn't believe how full I was without eating real food all day. Finally, the night concluded with my sixth and final juice around 7:00. The instructions of the cleanse say to try and drink the final juice about two hours before bedtime so even though I was full, I had to get this one finished. This time it was an Almond Nut Milk. Hehehe. Nut. Milk. Hehehe. (Better than Nut Butter I guess? Yes? No?) Please say you get my immature grossness? Anyway, this one was by far the highest caloric and most fattening of the juices and was made with raw almonds, vanilla bean, dates, and filtered water. It almost tasted like a melted nutty vanilla milkshake. So yeah, it was pretty good and a great way to end my first day of juicing. All in all, I was pretty shocked how well my body handled itself. There was a little diarrhea one more time for the night and I figure this was my colon cleansing itself from the day before. This made me super thankful I didn't eat heavy the previous two days or things could have been painful and worse. I was bloated by night's end and a little light headed, but all in all I survived day one and felt pretty good except for the fact that I didn't fall asleep until like 12:30 which is insanely late for me. Apparently the juice gave me some unexpected energy. Who knew?

Day 2: I woke up tired since I hadn't slept much the night before. Stomach didn't growl as I expected it too but got up to pee so many times and was restless. I still had some anxiety about being hungry the next day that kept me awake too. In my head, I kept thinking that day one went so well, things might turn on day two. But they didn't. Phew. I followed pretty much the same time frame on Day two as I did on day one and spread the juices out pretty well again.

For my first juice of the second day, I once again had the Sweet Greens juice. It tasted just as good on Day Two as it did the first. However, my second juice was WAY better than number two the first day. Two juices differ over the three days and one of them is juice two. Today it was Watermelon Lime. Freaking Amazing. So much deliciousness in there. Tasted like summer. I enjoyed every sip and didn't have to, or want to dilute it. Then came the third and forth juices, Essential Green and Spicy Lemonade which I wasn't a huge fan of on the first day. I got through them with much dilution which made me feel fuller. I then went to Bloomingdale's and treated myself to a new Marc Jacobs purse for my upcoming Europe trip (YOLO, right?). I then decided to walk the mile home from Bloomies too to burn off some energy. I still couldn't believe I wasn't dizzy and fainting. When I got home I had the Essential Red and finished off the evening with the yummy Almond Nut Milk. Nut milk still makes me giggle. Te He He.

All in all, day two shocked me the most because I thought it would be horrendous and it wasn't much different than day one. And in case you were wondering, I did have diarrhea again at night. Oh you weren't wondering? Too bad.  I will just say that the beets in the Essential Red certainly go through me. If I wasn't healthy and Colitis-flare-free at the moment, I would be really concerned by the color. Beets are red, so my poop was.... Okay, you get it. But since I felt pretty great, I am just assuming my body is digesting that juice at an über fast rate. TMI much?

Day 3: The last day! Woohoo. I was beyond tired because once again didn't fall asleep until almost midnight. I don't know if its the juice or the lack of exercise that is keeping me up. I am energized mentally but I don't think my body has enough fuel to sustain a run or spin class and I really didn't want to risk it. Day three was by far the hardest day for me. I wasn't hungry at all, but I was feeling light headed and actually felt like I was kinda drunk. It was strange. It was very hard for me to focus and at some points in the day, I was seeing spots. I didn't feel like I was going to pass out at all, but just kind of out of it and loopy for most of the day. However, I was still in a good mood.

As per usual, I started off the day with Sweet Greens and my juice two was different again for some variety. On this day it was Pineapple Ginger and it was a little too strong with the ginger. I had to chug, then dilute once again. But it wasn't awful. (Let me just tell you that after this juice, I had a lunch meeting at work where my principal provided pizza to everyone. I sat there with my water and smiled. The smell of the pizza was wonderful but I didn't budge or really feel that tempted. I paid too much for this cleanse and want the full benefits it has to offer to blow it now.) Juice three was once again the grass-tasting Essential Green which I continuously diluted and thank-the-lord juice four was the other different juice of the pack. It was Young Coconut Water and I was relieved to finally be done with the Spicy Lemonade. Too spicy for this chick. But the Young Coconut Water was quite refreshing and it got me through grocery shopping. I don't know if it was a good idea or not, but after work I went to Trader Joes to stock up on groceries for the upcoming week. Going to a grocery store when I haven't eaten in three days wasn't as torturous as I imagined, so that was a plus. I really wanted to go because I didn't want to wake up today and have no food in my apartment. After being on this cleanse, I am more inspired to eat even healthier. My shopping cart was loaded up with tons of veggies and lean protein and I wanted to eat all of it right away, but I had come too far. Two more juices for the cleanse and I was in the clear. The last two juices were the Essential Red and the Almond Nut Milk. At this point I just wanted the nut milk and just wanted to toss the Essential Red, but I needed the calories and nutrients and wanted to follow this cleanse to a "T" which means drinking every juice as instructed. I ignored my craving for the nut milk all day and it satisfied me for dinner. When the clock struck midnight and I was still awake (UGH!!) I wanted to call it a day and eat something, but I didn't let myself. I wanted three full days and nights of this cleanse so I wasn't going to break. Go me! High five. Pat on the back. I got through this sucker and it was a success! I am actually really proud of myself.

********************
So that's it, three very descriptive days of my juice cleanse. Not so awful. In fact, I think I kind of enjoyed it to a certain degree. I found it fulfilling. I liked challenging my body to do something it has never done before. I survived and I feel stronger mentally because of it. This was honestly something I wasn't sure my body would be able to do so I even impressed myself. Today, after a week of not working out, I am thrilled to be able to take a one hour spin class. I am nervous about going since I haven't had solid foods in three days, but I woke up extra early to eat and digest a real meal. A little natural peanut butter, a banana, and a sandwich thin. Should do the trick. Wish me luck.

Throughout this cleanse, I often surprised myself how well my body was handling it. On a regular day, when I don't eat real food every two hours or so I get light headed and feel my blood sugar lower. During this cleanse, that didn't really happen so much. I never really felt hungry over the course of these three days. I was pleasantly surprised that my stomach felt full most of the time. I think the liquids just kept building and building on each other. I did feel light headed at points, especially day three, but I guess that's part of the game.

So...what did I learn from the cleanse? 
       1) When you don't actually chew foods for a day, your teeth feel real grimy. It's weird. I couldn't figure out why my teeth felt like they had a film on them each day. Then I realized that since I wasn't chewing anything, nothing was exfoliating the teeth and getting rid of anything that clung to them which happens when you chew food, or even gum.
       2) I think one of the best things to come from this is I won't die if I don't eat every three hours. So that's good to know. But I did miss solid food a tiny bit, although not as much as I thought.  I guess chewing is more overrated than I thought.
      3) Good thing I am naturally perky. I am thankful that I do not drink caffeine because I think this would have made this cleanse extremely difficult. To detox from caffeine and cleanse would have been a double dose of awfulness.
      4) Doing this made me think an awful lot about what I put in my body on a daily basis and how I should really be a little more conscious of what I put in my body. This is the only one I'll ever have and I want it to last me a while and stay healthy. I won't say I will never have pizza, fries, or a hamburger again because that would be a big fat lie, but I am going to attempt to eat more "clean" and not do as many processed foods. Just because something is low calorie, low-fat, or claims to be healthy for you, does not mean that it's good for you. This is most definitely not new information to me at all, but I am going to start following those guidelines a little more. It should continue to give me heightened energy. 

So...would I do it again? Sure. I would do it again for the same reason I did this time: for a reset. A new start. And if the timing is right because if you can't do something like this 100%, its not really worth it in my opinion. I do wish it were cheaper, but overall, most of the juices tasted good and I would get them as a treat from time to time, especially the Sweet Greens and the Watermelon Mint.

So... do have any desire to do a juice cleanse now? Did I pique your curiosity more or less? And if not, did I at least inform you? Entertain you? Make you chuckle? Make you cringe? I do what I can.

And just because I probably won't get to say this again for a very long time:
Nut Milk!!!!!

3 comments:

  1. Pretty funny, but wasn't all true in my case. http://www.buzzfeed.com/rachelysanders/what-a-juice-cleanse-is-really-like-terrible-not-healthy

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  2. Agree that haven't felt as light headed as expected after a similar 3 day cleanse! A fun read! 5 days next time

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