The prep for this race has consumed me for the past four months and I had one goal in mind and that was to PR. All I wanted was a sub-4:30 marathon. I did the best I really could preparing for that and I missed it by 10 seconds. Ten mother-fucking seconds. Honestly though, I handled it a lot better than I thought I would so that's a mental victory for me. However, that means I am still on this mission to PR, which means Chicago 2015 might have to happen. But lets take a look back at Chicago 2014 while it's still fresh in my mind.
I flew home to Chicago Thursday night and couldn't have been happier to see my parents and just be home. Of course I cried, because I've been doing a lot of that lately due to my race anxiousness and general over-emotionalness (is that even a word?). I hadn't seen them since August, but I've been so emotional and stressed lately with work and with all the running, that seeing them was something I really needed. It was kind of late when I got in so we just caught up a bit and went to bed. On Friday, I laid around all morning and then my mom and I hit up the expo at McCormick Place. The Chicago Marathon usually has such a great expo and this was no exception. (Although the actual marathon shirt was a let down.) My mom loves going to these race expos as much as I do. I could see on her face though that she kind of regretted not signing up for the marathon as her 60th birthday present to herself, as her first marathon, Chicago 2004, (the same first as mine) was a 50th present to herself. We got our samples, looked at some clothes, took some pics and were on our merry little way. We got Lou Malnati's for dinner (yum!!) and just laid around the rest of the night. My knees had been super stiff and were bothering me and I was starting to panic about them. I iced, took tylenol, laid around and was asleep by 8:30 that night. Oh yes, it's always good to be home.
Saturday morning I had to run 2 miles. They were fast miles and felt so easy. The weather was perfect and it looked like that would be the case for race day too. Thankfully the rain was taken out of the forecast (which I had stalked all week long). I iced my knees again (eeek, this pain was starting to make me nervous) and had a pretty easy day. My mom and I ran some errands, but mostly it was a lazy day on the couch. We did go to Michaels (aka Heaven) to buy stuff for her to make a poster for me and to buy iron-on letters for my tank. I decided to go with a tank top for the first time ever for a marathon for me. For dinner, my dad made some delicious pasta and garlic bread. With that, I drank some Nuun and tried to ease my anxiousness. (We didn't bring in lasagna, my usual pre-long run meal, because when I had it at home last time before a half, I raced terribly, so clearly I wasn't taking that risk again.) I laid out my outfit for Sunday, packed my little bag and took many deep breaths. I slept decently well and when my alarm went off at 5:05 Sunday morning it was time do this! I got dressed, tried to eat some peanut butter on toast, drank another Nuun and my mom drove me over to her friend's house so I could get a ride down to the city. I cried in the car when she dropped me off (typical race day jitters) and then myself, her friend and her friend's friend got a ride to the start line. This was really happening. I still couldn't believe it was actually race day. All of my hard work was leading up to the big event. No pressure. Yeah, right. We were kind of early so hit up a Starbucks to use their bathroom and sit for a few. We walked over to the start and I proceeded to use to bathroom two more times. Since this wasn't my first rodeo, I brought my own toilet paper to the race start. I do this just in case there isn't any in the portos and because I like Charmin Blue. My tush is a snob and I don't care! Each time I walked in and out of the porta potty, people commented on how smart I was to have it. Duh. I don't mess around when it comes to the comforts of my butt. The lines were totally manageable which was great too. Good work Chicago. Soon enough it was time to get in our corrals. The 7:30 group had already began and I was in the first group of the 8:00 start. I knew once I actually started running I'd be okay. And so it started. I was on my way to my 8th 26.2.
My Garmin was up and running, but I was told by others it would be off mileage wise, which it seemed to be, so I kept it on the pace setting. I would use this to help me get to my PR. I also was looking forward to seeing some friendly faces along the way to help keep me going. I was going to have a friend at mile 8, a friend at mile 10, my parents at mile 13, my bro and his fiancé at mile 16, and my parents again at 22 and 26 (they're the best). This gave me something to look forward to. I saw each and everyone of them along the way and it was so awesome. So thank you guys! It truly means so much to me you would do that and you have no idea how much it means to me to have you out there. (Especially because the Chicago crowds were nowhere close to the NYC crowds. Not only were there not as many people out, they weren't as enthusiastic about cheering on random strangers. In NYC, people are almost lined up five deep along the route and screaming my name all the time. It was kind of odd to me but I'll get that experience again soon enough.)
Once I was in kind of rhythm, I was doing pretty well and feeling decent. I also know that it sometimes takes me up to six miles to get in a groove (prob when my mile 5 gel gets working) so I was just waiting for that and luckily it happened. At mile 8 I saw my friend which was awesome, then at mile 9 I saw another old friend. She was an accidental sighting which I love! She hopped in with me and starting running with me. It was unexpected but was so helpful. Just having someone by my side running with me makes the road less lonely and her support long the way was amazing. She ended up running 8 miles with me. At first she was talking to me a bit but then noticed I was kind of short. I wasn't trying to be rude, but when you run 26.2 miles, talking wastes energy, and that is something I need to conserve. She the asked if she should stop talking to me and I felt bad, but said yes. I told her I wasn't being a jerk, but it messes up my breathing. She understood and we kept going. When I hit 13.1, I was happy with my half-marathon pace and was feeling great. I could do this! I would make 4:29:59. That is, if my body would continue to cooperate.
After passing my other friend at 10 and my bro and fiancé at 16, she pulled out at 17. I thanked her and kept going knowing I would see my parents at 22, which was a LONG five miles away. I was still cruising away, looking at my Garmin for my pace and was happy with it. I saw them at 22 and knew in four miles I'd see them again and the finish line shortly thereafter. Then came mile 23. This is when things started to fall apart for me. First my calves started to cramp. This has almost happened before in my last two marathons. In Harrisburg 2012 and NYC 2013, they had felt like they were on the verge of cramping but they never quite did so. This time around they did. I had to pull over and stretch them. Then came the quad cramps. Two years ago, they were on the verge of cramping but never 100% cramped. Last year, this was the exact cramping that slowed me down and made me miss my PR. For the final three miles of this race, my quads and calves were spasming and cramping the entire time. I had to walk them out and hop a bit. I had to pull over and stretch multiple times. It was out of my control and pissed me off ridiculously. I had drank my gatorades and waters. I had taken my gels. I had even eaten the bananas at the final few water stops. Nothing was doing the trick. I kept trying to run it out and they would spasm. Then I would shriek, stretch, pound them, and do my best to keep going. I thought my muscles were literally going to pop out of my skin. It was that bad. I could see it through my crops. I am almost thankful I wasn't wearing shorts, because it would not have been pretty to see. With all the pain and discomfort, I knew I wasn't going to quit. That was for sure. It's not in my being to do so. Plus, my Garmin was saying I was still on pace to meet my goal so I knew I had a little wiggle room. When I saw my parents at 26, I started to cry. I was in pain and I was so close to crossing that finish line.
If you've run Chicago before, you know its a fairly flat course except for the final quarter mile which is uphill. Going up hill while both of your legs are cramping is not a pleasant experience. I fought through this pain and made my way across the finish line. I stopped my watch and was pretty sure I had gotten that PR. Then I pulled out my phone for the official score, and I didn't do it. That took the wind out of my sail. Big time. My Garmin and my tracker were off. Obviously the tracker is official so even though I thought for all of 15 seconds that I had the PR, I was wrong. Then the disappointment set it. 4:30:32. Ten seconds off my best time of 4:30:22. Ugh. I couldn't believe it. However, I didn't start sobbing uncontrollably as I thought I would. I teared a little but realized that I did my best. My legs cramping was out of my control. I fought through it which was all I could do. Sure, it slowed me down, but I literally couldn't move without a spasm for a good solid two and half miles. I never hit a wall this race. My legs themselves felt strong. My knees and hips were all good. I most definitely could have kept running had they not cramped. I had trained solidly. I just don't know why these cramps, that have now happened three marathons in a row and are getting significantly worse. My pre-race nutrition was on point. During the race, I got my electrolytes in and they still happened. I don't know what to do so it doesn't happen in the future, specifically New York in three weeks. Should I wear compressions socks? Should I take salt packets? Should I try different gels? What can I do to prevent this cramping? Ahhhhhh.
And now forget the cramping, WTF happened with my Garmin lying to me? Why was my pace off? If I didn't follow it, I may have had a better time. What if?!?!?! This thing was supposed to make me faster, which I believe it had, but it lied this time. After going back and looking at each mile splits, I saw where the pace error was. My Garmin did something at mile 17 where it calculated I did a 7:45 mile, which I clearly did not. That fast pace calculated into my average pace being faster but it still didn't affect my overall time which pissed me off. I am usually pretty accurate with my start and stop time, usually within two seconds of the official chip time. Not 45 like my time said. This bummed me out majorly. Ten seconds off a PR. Ten seconds guys. Ugh. This is going to haunt me a bit. But, like I said before, I wasn't as upset as I have been in the past. I don't know if I am mentally stronger (doubtful by all the tears shed leading up to this race) or the fact I know I did all I could within my control. I teared up a bit on and off the rest of the night, but in the big picture, I think I am just grateful I can still run 26.2 miles. My stomach and joints cooperated this whole training cycle. After flaring pretty bad this past spring again and almost having to be admitted to the hospital, my body was able to get back on track and work up until this point. I am so grateful for that because as much as running makes me crazy, it also keeps me sane and is a big part of my life.
People ask if after doing these back-to-back marathons, I will take a break for a little while. I will prob take a few days off after this and make sure my legs are ready to train again so I can be ready for Nov 2, and after that will prob take a little more time off. But honestly, anything beyond a week off, I start to get bored and antsy. I enjoy running. I enjoy spinning. I need to get rid of this excess energy in my life. But until then I have NYC on the brain. I am not going to obsess too much over this one. It's a harder course than Chicago and my legs have taken a beating the last four months so I am not expecting a PR. I want to run this race and enjoy it. And plus, I am running this one for IBDKids. This one is for charity, not for me. I want to run for those who can't. It's important to me. I will get over this not-PR race and just be proud I have another one under my belt. #8 wasn't exactly how I pictured it, but I finished it and I'm trying to just enjoy that.
You are amazing!!!!! There should be no second guessing yourself! You did everything the right way! Nothing to think about anymore! ON TO NYC!!!
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