Dr. Disappointment

I have previously written about sometimes, especially when it comes to guys and dating, I try to follow the mantra "You have nothing to lose, and a lot to gain."  I also try to impress this mantra onto my friends. We all need to put ourselves out there a little bit more. If you see someone you are attracted to and know that you may never see them again, you might as well grow a pair, and talk to them. Or better yet, ask them out for a drink or something. Or at least try to. Sometimes the results are great, and sometimes the results can be disappointing. And sometimes the results are straight up confusing. Let me tell you a little story about a girl who did just that. She reached out to a guy she just met, got false hope, and then was left super confused. So here the story goes...

The original HotDocs: McDreamy and McSteamy.

Once upon a time, there was a girl who got real sick and had to go to the hospital. While there she happened to be treated by a very cute doctor who we shall call "HotDoc." It was very hard for Girl to flirt with HotDoc during her stay at the hospital but knew that she found him attractive and wanted to see him again. After chickening out on multiple occasions to ask for his number and/or email, she did what any normal girl would do next: She Googled him. With the beauty of the internet (Facebook and LinkedIn to be exact), she realized that she and HotDoc actually had a mutual friend. She reached out to the mutual friend to find out the scoop and get some deets and was pretty successful in doing so. Friend thought he might have a gf but wasn't sure as she and HotDoc had not seen each other in a long time. Girl figured she would reach out to HotDoc anyway. If she didn't, there would always be that "What if?" in her head. She actually grew a pair and messaged him via FB (Friend didn't have a regular email for him so this was the only way to reach out). The message was cute and to the point.

  Hey,

 I just wanted to thank you for taking such good care of me while I was in the hospital. Wish we could have met under better circumstances. With that being said, I was wondering if you'd be interested in grabbing a drink (non-alcoholic for me of course for now), next week or something. Let me know if you'd be down for that. Looking forward to hearing back.

Friend also messaged HotDoc to be on the lookout for said message. Everything was in place. Girl was proud of herself for taking a risk and putting herself out there a bit. After all, what did she have to lose at this point? Worst comes to worst, he has a girlfriend and can use that as his excuse. I mean, why else wouldn't he want to date Girl. She is awesome.

A few days later, Girl received a message back from HotDoc and was excited by his response. (She also found out he wrote a positive message back to Friend regarding Friend's message to him to be on the lookout for Girl's message.)

Hey,

I hope your doing well and are much improved. The next week is a bit hectic for me, but would love to grab a non-alcoholic beverage with you at some point in the near future. Keep me in the loop. Cheers.

Girl was happy by this response and felt it was a sign in the right direction. She wasn't rejected as she had actually expected to be. She then wrote back to HotDoc to see if they could set something up.

Hey, 

I am getting better each day and it finally feels good to feel like my old self again. I was thinking if you were available next Wed or Thurs night to grab a drink, that would work. Let me know if that's good for you. You can email me back at my regular email (****@gmail.com) which might be easier than FB messaging.  Talk soon.

After this message was sent, she was feeling proud of herself. She had had nothing to lose, and felt that she might have something to gain now. Even if it was just one date. It took a lot for her to even write him in the first place. Unfortunately, this was the last correspondence between Girl and HotDoc. And Girl has no idea why. Girl's friends (who dissected email correspondence) have no idea why. Girl was confused and disappointed. WTF? 

So here is what I ask you: If HotDoc was not interested and knew he'd never see Girl again, why did he say he would love to get together if he had no intention to? There are so many things he could have said that to let girl down easily. He could have said he had a girlfriend or was seeing someone. Girl would have been none the wiser. He could have said he doesn't date patients. He could have said he has way too much going on right now to date anyone. He could have straight-up said he wasn't interested.  Or even though it sucks, he could have ignored her in the first place. But no, he told Girl he'd love to get together. Yet, he left her hanging. Once again, WTF?

Could Girl have read into the email it too much? Did she get her hopes up expecting to hear from him again? Did she misread the situation? This shouldn't be a guessing game. Does she reach out again? (She says she wants to but knows its a bad idea. Her friends say no way.) What's a girl to do? It seems as though the ending to this story is not going to be "Happily ever after" but Girl deserves some kind of response. Someone needs to write HotDoc a prescription for common courtesy because he clearly has none. But Girl, don't let this one jerk's lack of response get you down. Keep putting yourself out there. Eventually it will pay off and you will get the happy ending you deserve. Get 'em.