Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Why do I continue to watch?

We all know that I love reality TV and watch a lot of it. However, when the reality TV stars become tabloid fodder, it can take away some of the surprises and excitement that happen on the show. I could never understand why these shows continue to tease viewers with storylines that we already know the endings to. For example, Snooki's arrest on Jersey Shore last summer. Yes, I was excited to see it go down, but I knew exactly what was going to happen because I had read about it a thousand times online and in magazines. It kind of made it a snooze. And for this upcoming season I know Vinny leaves to go home mid-season so don't tease with a "will he or won't he?" So annoying. Even though I watch this show, I am not that big of a moron.

This type of thing happens quite often and no other shows makes me feel like I am a bigger idiot than any of the Kardashian shows on E! I only feel like an idiot because I continue to watch even though I know what is going to happen. I also know that the show is so fake and contrived. Since the Kardashians are in almost pretty much every single tabloid pretty much every week and they have diarrhea of the mouth when it comes to talking about themselves, little to nothing is private.

This brings me to this Sunday's episode of Kourtney and Kim Take New York. It was the third episode of the season and of course I can't get enough of this garbage so I tune in each week. The first episode aired three weeks ago and began with all the divorce headlines. It then rewound to eight weeks earlier when filming began and the couple was in newly "wedded bliss." Yes I know E!'s goal for the viewers is to want to watch this marriage unravel, but cut the bullshit. Don't tease us with things we already know the answers to. Anyway, this week's episode bothered me more than usual for some reason and this is why:
Kim without and with make-up
1) Kim wearing a full face of make-up. All. The. Time. I mean, seriously? I know this isn't anything new and I should be use to it by now, but this week had Kim in her pj's and in the bathtub; each time in an absolute FULL face of make-up. Girl was in foundation, fake-eyelashes, bright lipstick, everything to the max. So unnecessary. S0 phony. Who takes a bath with a full face of make-up? Isn't the point to get clean? Is she that insecure with her face makeupless that she won't show it on camera? She is a pretty girl but if this show is as "real" as she always defends it to be, why can't she just be real herself?

2) Kim going off birth control. Will they or won't they get preggers? Gosh, I am on the seat of my pants today wondering about this one. Ugh. The jig is up. You are getting divorced with no child on the way. We all know this. No one is going to believe that they are going to get pregnant so who really cares that she is going to go off birth control and are deciding if they want kids right away. There is no anticipation on this end. They should have just cut this storyline out because we all know how it ended. No baby Humphries is on the way and many court dates are in the future.
3) Kourtney being disgusted by finding porn on Scott's computer. She then goes running to Kim to show her what she found and of course Kim is repulsed too. Isn't it weird that Kim would look at computer porn and say how gross it is knowing she became famous because of a sex tape-turned- porno? (Sidenote: I wonder if Scott ever got off watching Kim's tape? GROSS! Think that's ever crossed Kourtney's mind?) Kim's tape wasn't necessarily meant to become a porn, but it became one. And a very famous one at that. She is so frickin' prissy and acts like she is above it all. But Kimmy, thank your lucky stars that people like porn because you wouldn't be who you are without it. And if you don't know what that is, let me a remind you: its a talentless, personality-less, big-assed, boring, vapid moron. But hey, I guess I am the bigger moron for tuning in each week. Whatevs.

Additionally, are we supposed to believe that Scott and Kourtney really weren't having any sex while in NY? (And kinda grossed out to the fact that he discussed this with Kris Jenner over fish tacos. (Ironic, no? Get it? Fish tacos. Ah.)) Considering Kourtney just came out to the public that she is pregnant again, her and Scott were obviously getting it on. In her magazine interview she stated how they had a lot of sex and the show really edited it to look as if their relationship was a lot worse than it really was. I know that is the beast that is the editing of reality TV, but c'mon now.

Even though I have so many issues with this show, I do find it entertaining and set my DVR each week so I can watch it without interruption. So maybe I shouldn't complain. Ha. Who am I kidding? Of course I am going to. And that is because I am one of the reasons this trash continues to make millions and I hate myself for it.  I know how fake and ridiculous it is and still continue to tune in. Sue me. But seriously, Ryan Seacrest and E!, I am not a complete fucking idiot, so please don't treat me like one. I am sure you can manufacture plenty of other original fake storylines that we don't already know the endings to. So save the "Is Kourtney pregnant again?" storyline." Thanks so much.

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