Fashion Don'ts From a Non-Fashionista

I am not, by any means, a fashionista. I don't claim to be one either. I am a jeans and T-shirt type of girl. Okay, okay...More like sweatpants and hoody type of girl. I dress for comfort over style 90% of the time. But when its time to get dressed up, I must admit that I do clean up well.

Although I may not follow all the trends, I am very aware of what trends are in style, what looks good and what doesn't.  I read enough fashion/style/gossip magazines to know what looks are popular and should be worn and what looks never look good on anyone no matter how skinny or pretty they are. While there are some styles that some models or celebrities can actually pull off that us real people could never do, there are some that NO ONE looks good in. Ever.

1. Clear Bra Straps. I clearly don't get it (pun intended!) You can still see them. They are clear, not invisible. They make you look cheap, and trashy. You aren't fooling anyone. Either just wear a regular bra and look equally ridiculous or go out and buy yourself a good strapless.
 
2. Denim on Denim.  I keep reading that this trend is back making a comeback. I cannot get on board with this one. I was always taught that you wear one item that is denim. Either just jeans. Or JUST a jean jacket. Not both together.

3. Ed Hardy/Christian Audigier/Smet. This apparel is usually worn by the bridge and tunnel crowd. If you are a dude and wearing this you are probably the gorilla-juicehead type (or a wannabe). You might as well just wear a nametag that says "Hello my name is Douchebag." Blech. I also find it humorous that these men pay so much money for a T-shirt with so much rhinestones, sequins, and glitter. Mucho effeminate.

4. Bikinis and high heels. This look seems to happening more and more at pool parties and beaches. If you are in a bathing suit, wear flip flops or be barefoot. Heels just make you look like you are trying too hard. Even if you have a smokin' body, wearing heels with your bikini just makes you look like a you are in a pageant or you are a stripper. Keep it classy, ladies. Courtney from Most Eligible Dallas was basically reading my mind when she gave her opinion on the issue. I was laughing hysterically when she gave her confessional about it on a recent episode. (Def click that link.)

5. Belly Chains. Kim Kardashian, Beyonce, and Rihanna wear these occasionally when photographed on the beach. And each time I see these I think how absolutely tacky they look.  I don't understand people that wear a lot of jewelery when at the beach or the pool, let alone a chain...on your belly. What's the point? I can't handle it. If a celeb looks ridic in this, a real person is going to look plain redonk. Don't do it. Please.

  6. Summer scarves. I know scarves are a fashion trend. And I like scarves. They are a necessity in the the winter and are cute in the fall and early spring as an accessory. But when it's 90 degrees out, the last thing I want on my body is extra fabric, let alone cotton, silk, linen, or whatever material it is around my neck. I understand people wanting to look cute in extreme heat, but you just look nonsensical wearing a scarf in a heat wave. Everyone knows you're hot. You aren't fooling anyone. When I look at you, I sweat more and you make me feel like I am suffocating. So basically, me not liking this trend is kind of selfish, but I also want you to be more comfortable. I got your back. When its that hot out, you can take one for the team, and just not be super fashionable for one day. I think society will understand.

One trend you'd probably be surprised that I am not against is animal prints. For some reason I am a fan of the leopard and zebra print, but not together. That is just plain unacceptable in my book. Regardless of what I think looks good, everyone is entitled to their opinion. Just know, I am judging you. And if you see me walking down the street in legit sweatpants and a hoody, feel free to snicker if you want to. I won't be offended.